In shock

I went to a really small Christian high school in Florida. Graduated in 1998 in a class of 14...small. The school is connected to a small Baptist church. Pastor and Mrs. Gustafson started the school 30-something years ago (I think this is the 33rd year) so that their three girls could go to a Christian school.

Pastor (we all called him that...even when he was head-coach of the baseball team, I think they called him 'Pastor' rather than 'Coach.')...anyway, Pastor pastored the church and the school and Miss Dana (his wife) was the school administrator.

Pastor and Miss Dana's youngest daughter, Ruth, graduated a year ahead of me, but because our school was so small, we all knew each other and were friends. Ruth and I played both volleyball and softball together and where in NHS and a few classes together. A couple years (I guess) after she graduated, Ruth married Joe Tyndale, a guy she had graduated with and with whom I was also friends.

Last week, Ruth had her third child and some intense post-partum. I think she and Joe and the kids live in South Carolina. Yesterday, Joe found Ruth out by a lake with a gun...he begged her not to do it...and she shot herself, in front of him.

She's left three kids, a husband, two sisters and 4 or 5 nieces and nephews, not to mention her parents. Pastor and Miss Dana are still running the school/church, but I hear that Pastor has taken this really hard (understandably) and has gone into some sort of shock.

I'm a little shocked and numb myself. I think with going to Ellie's service and all, my brain is setting Ruth aside until I can deal with Ellie. I mean, really? Ruth really was that girl in school. A star on the volleyball and basketball courts, softball field, in the NHS and high school ensemble, Homecoming Queen...I don't remember but probably Senior class President, and she dated the cute guy...her Junior year, the cute guy changed schools for his Senior year so he could go to school with her.

Wow.